Byron Katie has said, "All sadness is a tantrum." Why would she say such a thing? This seemed really crazy the first time I heard it; in fact, I had a little tantrum over it. "Easy for Katie to say," I spluttered. "Let her live my life for a few days and see if she still thinks my depression isn't justified."
But having sat with Katie's words over and again throughout the years, I realized that this was indeed true for me. My deepest depression has been the result of believing that my life ought to be different than it is. My depressive thoughts are always about not getting my way. Having recognized that, I have become more willing to sit with the possibility that I am throwing a hissy fit every time I want to give up and check out. Can I know that what I want is what is best for the world, or for me? Can I know I would be happier if things were different? Who would I be without my story? These are very important questions to ask, and my answers have been the most effective "anti-depressant" I've ever tried...and I tried many.
I hear from many others that The Work dovetails beautifully with their treatment for depression. They are able to meet their depression with understanding while they take their meds and supplements, work their 12-step programs, take care of their nutrition and sleep needs and follow their doctors' advice.
Psychiatrist Dr. Daniel Amen, who describes depressive thinking as "the ANTS that invade your brain" (ANTS is an acronym for Automatic Negative Thoughts), has said that he works with the "hardware" of the brain, and recommends The Work as "software."
Want to know more about this phenomenon of sadness=tantrum? I'm writing about it, and including penetrating inquiry-based exercises, in my upcoming Transformational Inquiry eBook.
Have you pre-ordered your copy yet?
Transformational Inquiry: Asking Depression will be the third of an ongoing series of practical guides that help you to apply The Work of Byron Katie to real-life situations. Upon its completion in the late fall of 2008 (we'll see if that comes true!), it will sell for $24.95. I am offering it now to readers of my newsletter and blog at the pre-publication price of $19.95, until June 30, 2008.
Shoot me an email with the order code available here to receive instructions for ordering before the June 30th deadline.
Because you're helping me to pay the bills in the meantime, you'll be among the first to receive the book when it becomes available, along with a gift: Three Realizations, a collection of "Aha! moments" that changed the lives of some of many of my dear friends...among them life coaches, writers, musicians, artists, office workers, educators, students and teachers of spirituality, and fellow facilitators of The Work of Byron Katie.
For more information and to order, visit
before June 30, 2008.
©2008 by Carol L. Skolnick; all rights reserved.