Here's a story, purportedly mine, that is only a couple of weeks old, yet it already feels like it happened to someone else.
One night, I did The Work with a friend on the thought, "I am getting depressed again." In spite of all the inquiry I have done and continue to do, and even though I no longer see myself as "a depressive," depressing thoughts return sometimes. Every now and then I get mired in them, temporarily.
I called my friend because I didn't even know what I needed to work on at first. I'd been afraid and bitchy for days. Sitting with my thoughts alone was excruciating. Sitting with others, the people I work with and mentor, I was concerned that if I were to be self-relevatory, I'd be taking away from their time, their needs.
Perhaps I had been overly honest while participating in a recent conference call; with the exception of writing, I'm not yet entirely comfortable with public vulnerability. Perhaps it was because, with the seasonal changes in temperature and light, I was experiencing a rerun of my old Seasonal Affective Disorder story. Maybe it was because I hadn't gone swimming outdoors in a few days; I get off track when I don't eat well, rest, and exercise in addition to working with my thoughts. Also I haven't slept well in over a year. When sleep doesn't happen, other things tend to go out the window.
Blah, blah, blah, and on the thoughts go.
While believing the thought "I am getting depressed again," I started back-tracking in many ways: punishing myself for being human, blaming the old brain chemistry story for my recent outbursts, feeling yet again that I ought to throw in the towel, take down my blog and website, get a "real" job, stop pretending that I am in any way qualified to do what I do. I was either forgetting to do simple self-care things, like brushing my teeth or eating breakfast, or putting them off until uncomfortably late in the day.
I revealed all this in the course of inquiry. And then came the turnaround: "I am not getting depressed again." It could be as true, I reckoned; I was not too depressed to reach out to my beloved friend, to stop being available for my clients, to recognize I was "off" and in need of inquiry.
Was there another turnaround, my friend wanted to know? My mind went to the opposite of "depressed." "I am getting elated again," I told her, and immediately burst into gales of laughter! In that moment, simply being a woman sitting in a couch taking on the telephone to her friend, there was absolutely nothing depressing. Even as I questioned my fear of returning to a painful story of the past, it ceased to be as powerful or compelling as it had been. Just naming the feelings, and the thoughts preceding them, began to take the edge off.
It's not a mere flick of the mental switch, mind you; without the deep education of the four questions and turnaround, to move from "I am getting depressed again" to "I am getting elated again" would be nothing more than an affirmation, largely meaningless.
In The Work, we don't exchange one thought with another, more uplifting one. The Work is a reductive process, what a therapist friend of mine calls "cognitive de-structuring" as opposed to, say, Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, which is a re-structuring of thought patterns. When we inquire, we gradually work our way to the opposites, after calling the mind's bluff about what it habitually has held dear. Otherwise, there is no proof that anything else could be equally true or truer, and the mind needs concrete examples in order to shift its loyalties.
To move from depression to elation wasn't a goal in doing this inquiry, and I didn't even know it was possible. All I knew was that I was caught in a story that was excruciating and therefore may not have been entirely accurate, I recognized a certain stubbornness in clinging to my belief, and at the same time, the curiosity and wilingness to see if there was anything else available to me. I was tired of beating myself.
In retrospect, I am not surprised that I became elated after questioning my thoughts. Depression is compressed, heavy, dense, low. When we question our depressive thinking, we are left with less gravity, nothing to cling to, nowhere to go but up.
©2007 by Carol L. Skolnick; all rights reserved.
SOUL SURGERY: exercises in inquiry with Carol L. Skolnick, Coach/Facilitator ClearLifeSolutions.com
Showing posts with label cognitive behavioral therapy. Show all posts
Showing posts with label cognitive behavioral therapy. Show all posts
October 12, 2007
November 30, 2006
The Work of Byron Katie and Cognitive Behavioral Therapy: A Comparison
by Jane Bunker, Ph.D. with Carol L. Skolnick, M.A.
As a growing number of therapists, counselors and coaches incorporate the self-inquiry process called The Work of Byron Katie into their practices, the question often arises, "How does The Work compare to Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT)?" There are notable similarities in that The Work, like CBT, is a cognitive restructuring technique. However, unlike CBT, The Work does not seek to replace one thought with another, less stressful thought; it is an experiential modality in which stressful thoughts are identified, expressed and questioned, resulting in an awareness of projective identification.
Here are some fundamental differences between the two approaches.
1. CBT: Achieve specific result
The Work: Discover what's true for the client
If there is a goal in The Work, it is to discover what is true for the client. The underlying assumption of The Work is that all suffering comes from arguing with reality. The secondary assumption is that reality is good. With CBT, the goal is to achieve a specific, client and therapist devised end result (i.e., to be happier, to have a better marriage, to like one's job more, etc.). CBT assumes that reality can be manipulated in order to achieve a particular, more desirable outcome....the secondary assumption here being that reality is flawed.
2. CBT: Necessitates a therapist
The Work: Does not need therapist or facilitator
CBT necessitates a therapist; The Work, which is self-directed, does not require a therapist or even a facilitator. Even if facilitated by a therapist or performed in a group setting, the simple structure of The Work's four basic self-inquiry questions and its reversal technique, the "turnaround," entrusts the process to the client. Administered cleanly, there will be no imposition of therapist's opinion or values in the course of a session.
3. CBT: Replace painful thoughts with "better" ones
The Work: Does not attempt to replace thoughts; painful thoughts dissolve
Both CBT and The Work are clear about the powerful role that thoughts play in human suffering. CBT, however, attempts to get the client to drop these thoughts and replace them with new, more productive, positive ones. In The Work, one part of the mind examines the other. There is no room for the normally defensive, proof-seeking part of the mind to hold on to the identity-defining thoughts that have been contributing to the client's suffering. With the resulting clarity that comes of mind meeting mind, the stressful thoughts serve no further purpose and dissolve on their own.
Also, by directing the client's pain outward on paper, The Work provides an initial vehicle for releasing rather than adding stress, the latter being a phenomenon which may occur in CBT when judgments are aimed at the self.
4. Both CBT and The Work address question 1 of The Work: Is it true? -- to expose the lie of the mind. However, The Work goes significantly further with question 2: Can you absolutely know that it's true? -- by attempting to eliminate even a 1% probability for the "I-know mind" to attach to and thus short-circuit the rest of the process. With questions 3 and 4: How do you react when you believe this thought? Who would you be without this thought? -- The Work offers the opportunity to hold thought up to the light, examine it openly, see the damage it has evoked and what life might be like without it. The subsequent turnaround -- a reversal technique in which the client considers ways in which the opposite of the belief might be just as true or truer -- offers a perfectly timed glimpse of one's own innocent, but complete, responsibilty for one's own happiness, while providing an expanded awareness of what "truth" encompasses. As in advaita vedanta, the Indian school of nondual philosophy, there is a gradual recognition that all experience is projected, and when the "projector" is adjusted, the projection changes.
5. Embedded in the turnaround is the concept of nonduality. All that was directed at the other appears to be true of the self as well. All that was apparently not absolutely true of the other might not be absolutely true of the self either. With The Work's loving, incisive probing, thoughts are eventually relieved of their charge. The safety and comfort of truth discovered replaces the client's need for attachment to identity-defining thoughts, and those thoughts are released in their obsolescence.
©2005 by Jane Bunker, Ph.D. and Carol L. Skolnick, M.A.
_____
Jane Bunker is an artist and a retired psychologist from Santa Fe, New Mexico and Boise, Idaho, whose practice incorporated CBT and other modalities. Carol L. Skolnick is a Santa Cruz, California-based writer, educator, and facilitator of The Work of Byron Katie. Both Jane and Carol are graduates of Byron Katie's School for The Work and have served on the staff of the school.
As a growing number of therapists, counselors and coaches incorporate the self-inquiry process called The Work of Byron Katie into their practices, the question often arises, "How does The Work compare to Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT)?" There are notable similarities in that The Work, like CBT, is a cognitive restructuring technique. However, unlike CBT, The Work does not seek to replace one thought with another, less stressful thought; it is an experiential modality in which stressful thoughts are identified, expressed and questioned, resulting in an awareness of projective identification.
Here are some fundamental differences between the two approaches.
1. CBT: Achieve specific result
The Work: Discover what's true for the client
If there is a goal in The Work, it is to discover what is true for the client. The underlying assumption of The Work is that all suffering comes from arguing with reality. The secondary assumption is that reality is good. With CBT, the goal is to achieve a specific, client and therapist devised end result (i.e., to be happier, to have a better marriage, to like one's job more, etc.). CBT assumes that reality can be manipulated in order to achieve a particular, more desirable outcome....the secondary assumption here being that reality is flawed.
2. CBT: Necessitates a therapist
The Work: Does not need therapist or facilitator
CBT necessitates a therapist; The Work, which is self-directed, does not require a therapist or even a facilitator. Even if facilitated by a therapist or performed in a group setting, the simple structure of The Work's four basic self-inquiry questions and its reversal technique, the "turnaround," entrusts the process to the client. Administered cleanly, there will be no imposition of therapist's opinion or values in the course of a session.
3. CBT: Replace painful thoughts with "better" ones
The Work: Does not attempt to replace thoughts; painful thoughts dissolve
Both CBT and The Work are clear about the powerful role that thoughts play in human suffering. CBT, however, attempts to get the client to drop these thoughts and replace them with new, more productive, positive ones. In The Work, one part of the mind examines the other. There is no room for the normally defensive, proof-seeking part of the mind to hold on to the identity-defining thoughts that have been contributing to the client's suffering. With the resulting clarity that comes of mind meeting mind, the stressful thoughts serve no further purpose and dissolve on their own.
Also, by directing the client's pain outward on paper, The Work provides an initial vehicle for releasing rather than adding stress, the latter being a phenomenon which may occur in CBT when judgments are aimed at the self.
4. Both CBT and The Work address question 1 of The Work: Is it true? -- to expose the lie of the mind. However, The Work goes significantly further with question 2: Can you absolutely know that it's true? -- by attempting to eliminate even a 1% probability for the "I-know mind" to attach to and thus short-circuit the rest of the process. With questions 3 and 4: How do you react when you believe this thought? Who would you be without this thought? -- The Work offers the opportunity to hold thought up to the light, examine it openly, see the damage it has evoked and what life might be like without it. The subsequent turnaround -- a reversal technique in which the client considers ways in which the opposite of the belief might be just as true or truer -- offers a perfectly timed glimpse of one's own innocent, but complete, responsibilty for one's own happiness, while providing an expanded awareness of what "truth" encompasses. As in advaita vedanta, the Indian school of nondual philosophy, there is a gradual recognition that all experience is projected, and when the "projector" is adjusted, the projection changes.
5. Embedded in the turnaround is the concept of nonduality. All that was directed at the other appears to be true of the self as well. All that was apparently not absolutely true of the other might not be absolutely true of the self either. With The Work's loving, incisive probing, thoughts are eventually relieved of their charge. The safety and comfort of truth discovered replaces the client's need for attachment to identity-defining thoughts, and those thoughts are released in their obsolescence.
©2005 by Jane Bunker, Ph.D. and Carol L. Skolnick, M.A.
_____
Jane Bunker is an artist and a retired psychologist from Santa Fe, New Mexico and Boise, Idaho, whose practice incorporated CBT and other modalities. Carol L. Skolnick is a Santa Cruz, California-based writer, educator, and facilitator of The Work of Byron Katie. Both Jane and Carol are graduates of Byron Katie's School for The Work and have served on the staff of the school.
September 29, 2006
Some Q&As about The Work of Byron Katie
Here are some answers to a few frequently-asked questions about Transformational Inquiry with The Work of Byron Katie.
Q: Isn't The Work a form of psychotherapy? It seems similar to Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT).
A: Therapy by definition involves the diagnosis and treatment of mental disorders by trained, licensed personnel. The Work is not about changing, treating or curing anything and it does not replace psychotherapy, nor is there an assumption that clients are "ill" or not. That said, The Work provides a clean and simple way to approach "thinking disorders," or attachments to self-limiting beliefs that are not true or useful to the client. A facilitator asks questions, and the client answers them if she is willing. As a facilitator, I guide clients through the process of questioning what they believe. As an educator and workshop leader, I design and introduce exercises and disseminate information. I don't diagnose or treat anyone or anything because I am not a therapist.
The Work is a cognitive process because we are working with cognition (thinking). Unlike CBT, there is no concept of pathology and therefore there is nothing to treat or cure. However, inquiring into one's stressful beliefs is a useful component of the therapeutic process...which is why many mental health professionals incorporate The Work into their work with patients. Inquiry is quite compatible with most talk therapies and its results are consistent with cutting-edge research on the brain, the mind and its mechanisms. The Work has been used in Mind-Body Medicine programs at Stanford University Medical Center and Kaiser-Permanente in California in conjunction with mindfulness meditation to help patients suffering from anxiety, depression, stress, infertility and chronic pain. In addition, the student health center at the University of Washington offers The Work of Byron Katie to students as a stress-reduction technique. The Work has also been offered as part of training for psychotherapists at the California Institute of Integral Studies in San Francisco, one of the country's leading institutions offering degrees in transpersonal psychology. Renowned ADD and brain scientist Dr. Daniel Amen, founder of Amen Clinics, recommends The Work and offers Katie's books at his website, amenclinics.com.
Q: What makes someone qualified to facilitate The Work? Do you have a certification?
A: Facilitators who have been certified (2007) by the Institute for The Work are the only facilitators recognized by Byron Katie International to provide the pure experience of this inquiry process. Certified Facilitators have fulfilled 100 days of requirements (over 400 hours), have been approved personally by Katie, and are bound by a code of Facilitator Ethics. Certified Facilitators must also keep their certification current each year. I was a member of the first group of 17 facilitators worldwide to receive the ITW Certified Facilitator credential in the spring of 2007.
Since The Work itself is is easily learned and available to anyone at no cost, there are people teaching and using The Work who have never attended the School for The Work and are not Certified Facilitators. They may be fine facilitators, but there is no oversight. So,"know your facilitator."
Q: Isn't The Work a very emotional experience? What if someone "loses it" during a session?
A: In my workshops and in private sessions, people often experience sadness, grief, anger, ecstasy, laughter, tears, irritation, anger, boredom, etc. It's natural to feel and express emotions in the process of self-inquiry, just as we experience them in our daily lives when our issues bubble up. In life, when we "lose it," we either "find it" or we call 9-1-1. In The Work, it's the same.
Q: So then, is The Work a form of coaching?
A: The Work is not coaching in and of itself, and it is an invaluable tool for coaches. I love to teach coaches how to use inquiry with their clients because it can make their jobs a lot easier. I have been a coaching client myself, and my coach, Melanie Keveles, frequently includes The Work in our sessions.
Here's a distinction: in coaching, there is a desired outcome for the client, because the client has come to the coach with an intention or a goal. In The Work, the only intention is for the client to meet stressful thoughts with understanding through self-inquiry. By showing up, the client has expressed a desire to know the truth; the facilitator asks questions to assist that process. If I have an agenda for my client to "get" something, it may interfere with his own process of self-discovery and in fact limit it.
Through self-inquiry, the mind calls its own bluff. When the coaching client's self-limiting beliefs are examined in the light of the questions, the beliefs often dissolve, enabling the coach to better help the client solidify their intentions and formulate action plans.
Q: Will The Work interfere with other transformative healing work that I am doing, or with religious practices...for example, 12-step programs, meditation, worship, other self-help modalities?
A: Some of my friends and clients involved in The Work have included devout Muslims, Hindus, Christians and Jews, Buddhist teachers, a Catholic priest, numerous interfaith ministers and the former head monk of a Hare Krishna temple...not to mention atheists and agnostics, activists and pacifists, Republicans and Democrats, self-help teachers and healers of all stripes. Many of the people I have met at Katie's schools practice The Work concurrently with Sedona Method, The Journey, A Course in Miracles, and various forms of yoga and meditation. Friends in recovery tell me that The Work dovetails beautifully with the 12 steps; it is, after all, the epitome of a "fearless moral inventory."
Some fear that they will have to give up whatever else they're doing if they question their beliefs. Can you absolutely know that this is true? Jews have been questioning their own scriptures since the origins of Judaism! The aforementioned Hare Krishna friend never questioned his belief in Krishna; if a belief is not stressful, there is no need to question it. Rather, when he discovered The Work he saw it as a message and a gift from Krishna.
You needn't ever let go of your religion, your practices, your sacred beliefs; I haven't. The suggestion is to continue to do everything that serves you and brings you joy...and question what doesn't. If you love meditation, ritual, prayer, going to meetings, and you love The Work too, good!
Q: Isn't The Work a form of psychotherapy? It seems similar to Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT).
A: Therapy by definition involves the diagnosis and treatment of mental disorders by trained, licensed personnel. The Work is not about changing, treating or curing anything and it does not replace psychotherapy, nor is there an assumption that clients are "ill" or not. That said, The Work provides a clean and simple way to approach "thinking disorders," or attachments to self-limiting beliefs that are not true or useful to the client. A facilitator asks questions, and the client answers them if she is willing. As a facilitator, I guide clients through the process of questioning what they believe. As an educator and workshop leader, I design and introduce exercises and disseminate information. I don't diagnose or treat anyone or anything because I am not a therapist.
The Work is a cognitive process because we are working with cognition (thinking). Unlike CBT, there is no concept of pathology and therefore there is nothing to treat or cure. However, inquiring into one's stressful beliefs is a useful component of the therapeutic process...which is why many mental health professionals incorporate The Work into their work with patients. Inquiry is quite compatible with most talk therapies and its results are consistent with cutting-edge research on the brain, the mind and its mechanisms. The Work has been used in Mind-Body Medicine programs at Stanford University Medical Center and Kaiser-Permanente in California in conjunction with mindfulness meditation to help patients suffering from anxiety, depression, stress, infertility and chronic pain. In addition, the student health center at the University of Washington offers The Work of Byron Katie to students as a stress-reduction technique. The Work has also been offered as part of training for psychotherapists at the California Institute of Integral Studies in San Francisco, one of the country's leading institutions offering degrees in transpersonal psychology. Renowned ADD and brain scientist Dr. Daniel Amen, founder of Amen Clinics, recommends The Work and offers Katie's books at his website, amenclinics.com.
Q: What makes someone qualified to facilitate The Work? Do you have a certification?
A: Facilitators who have been certified (2007) by the Institute for The Work are the only facilitators recognized by Byron Katie International to provide the pure experience of this inquiry process. Certified Facilitators have fulfilled 100 days of requirements (over 400 hours), have been approved personally by Katie, and are bound by a code of Facilitator Ethics. Certified Facilitators must also keep their certification current each year. I was a member of the first group of 17 facilitators worldwide to receive the ITW Certified Facilitator credential in the spring of 2007.
Since The Work itself is is easily learned and available to anyone at no cost, there are people teaching and using The Work who have never attended the School for The Work and are not Certified Facilitators. They may be fine facilitators, but there is no oversight. So,"know your facilitator."
Q: Isn't The Work a very emotional experience? What if someone "loses it" during a session?
A: In my workshops and in private sessions, people often experience sadness, grief, anger, ecstasy, laughter, tears, irritation, anger, boredom, etc. It's natural to feel and express emotions in the process of self-inquiry, just as we experience them in our daily lives when our issues bubble up. In life, when we "lose it," we either "find it" or we call 9-1-1. In The Work, it's the same.
Q: So then, is The Work a form of coaching?
A: The Work is not coaching in and of itself, and it is an invaluable tool for coaches. I love to teach coaches how to use inquiry with their clients because it can make their jobs a lot easier. I have been a coaching client myself, and my coach, Melanie Keveles, frequently includes The Work in our sessions.
Here's a distinction: in coaching, there is a desired outcome for the client, because the client has come to the coach with an intention or a goal. In The Work, the only intention is for the client to meet stressful thoughts with understanding through self-inquiry. By showing up, the client has expressed a desire to know the truth; the facilitator asks questions to assist that process. If I have an agenda for my client to "get" something, it may interfere with his own process of self-discovery and in fact limit it.
Through self-inquiry, the mind calls its own bluff. When the coaching client's self-limiting beliefs are examined in the light of the questions, the beliefs often dissolve, enabling the coach to better help the client solidify their intentions and formulate action plans.
Q: Will The Work interfere with other transformative healing work that I am doing, or with religious practices...for example, 12-step programs, meditation, worship, other self-help modalities?
A: Some of my friends and clients involved in The Work have included devout Muslims, Hindus, Christians and Jews, Buddhist teachers, a Catholic priest, numerous interfaith ministers and the former head monk of a Hare Krishna temple...not to mention atheists and agnostics, activists and pacifists, Republicans and Democrats, self-help teachers and healers of all stripes. Many of the people I have met at Katie's schools practice The Work concurrently with Sedona Method, The Journey, A Course in Miracles, and various forms of yoga and meditation. Friends in recovery tell me that The Work dovetails beautifully with the 12 steps; it is, after all, the epitome of a "fearless moral inventory."
Some fear that they will have to give up whatever else they're doing if they question their beliefs. Can you absolutely know that this is true? Jews have been questioning their own scriptures since the origins of Judaism! The aforementioned Hare Krishna friend never questioned his belief in Krishna; if a belief is not stressful, there is no need to question it. Rather, when he discovered The Work he saw it as a message and a gift from Krishna.
You needn't ever let go of your religion, your practices, your sacred beliefs; I haven't. The suggestion is to continue to do everything that serves you and brings you joy...and question what doesn't. If you love meditation, ritual, prayer, going to meetings, and you love The Work too, good!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)